Did you really lose your mind, or is it just your mindset? According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, the definition of mindset is: a mental attitude or a fixed state of mind. So, based on those two definitions, we are theoretically dealing with attitude and a fixed state of mind. A person’s state of mind is attributed to their mood. Their mood then reflects how they react, respond, and go about their day, week, month, life, etc. I think you get it. Point is… Mindset is a game changer both positively and negatively. It can stop you in your tracks but it can also catapult you into a trajectory that is life changing. However… Mindset can be tricky. It pulls the shades down, controls the lighting, and makes you believe that “it” is the director of your life. Sometimes, for all the wrong reasons. It’s time to change that theory and make YOU the director, producer, lead actor/actress of YOUR own Oscar award winning Hollywood version of mindset. Plain and simple, we have the opportunity to believe anything that we want, why shouldn’t we aim for the stars? At some point in our lives, we’ve dealt with hard times, a break up, job loss, a bad grade, etc. You probably lost sleep, gained or lost weight, were not so nice to other people, all because of the mindset that this situation created. Anyone relate? One thing that I have learned over the years is that we always have a choice in how we feel. As much as we like to blame others for our mental state, it’s our ballgame. I know, like how many times have you heard that? “Just change the way you look at it” right? I thought so too, not so easy, but really it is. I’d be willing to bet that the situations that you fretted over and lost days of sleep over could have been minimized if you had just changed your mindset; (A.K.A.) attitude. It really does come down to our thoughts. Can you imagine if your mind constantly thought that life is rigged to go just YOUR way? What could you accomplish? Whatever you are hoping to achieve or do is much more likely to be in your field of possibility than if you just say, “that will never happen!” It is a mindset shift. Furthermore, being in a FEAR mindset really limits how you live your life. When we are looking at the concept of hypnotherapy, it is an alternative process to help peel away the layers and get to the bottom of why someone has a particular limiting mindset/belief. I would say more often than not, people don’t turn to hypnotherapy because everything in life is amazing. Often it is the last resort, because the client has tried everything else and it hasn’t worked. You could attribute most anything that people do to their current mindset. Good, bad, or indifferent. The beauty of hypnotherapy is that the process allows the client to see where their limited beliefs and patterns are and how they can move forward. The therapist is simply the bridge helping the client get to the lesson meant to help them. You could say that building a positive mindset is like working a muscle. We need to remind ourselves that our mindset can completely change a situation, over and over and over again. Build the mindset muscle so that it remembers its strength and doesn’t give in to the pity party. It also requires flexibility too. Learn how to make it adaptable in various situations. I know that this is going to sound cliché’ but life is what you make of it. You know, “when life gives you lemons, you make lemon cake, lemonade, lemon drops, etc.” lemons are sour and bitter but when you change your mind and think about how you can sweeten them somehow, they can make some pretty delicious things. Our thoughts are no different, whether they are lemons or rainbows. We make the choice in how we want them to affect our lives. By taking note of the things that happen to you day to day, it will give you a glimpse of the type of mindset you have. It is fascinating to me how much the subconscious part of the brain runs our daily show and we aren’t even aware of it until it is brought to our attention. That’s where the beauty of hypnotherapy comes in handy. Finding the boulders or in some cases the pebbles that are in our way and helping to remove them. When you become aware of the patterns that your brain has you believing and you reframe your thoughts, your mindset begins to change. The needle is no longer stuck in the groove of the song Doom and Gloom. You realize that you have the ability to change the record. Like the band Journey says, “Don’t stop believing” in all the amazing experiences that are out there waiting for you to do and see. Now that you know your attitude can shift and you can accomplish things you didn’t originally think possible, it doesn’t mean that it is like that forever. It takes reminders and pep talks and maybe even more challenges but the beauty is, you’ve seen success and change and you know what it feels like. Think of a mindset like a garden. Weeds in a garden are like the random thoughts that we have in our brain that don’t look so good. They are reminders of the work needed to clean up our garden, so that we can successfully grow whatever it is that we are planting. Sometimes it takes multiple tries to get the weeds under control, but when we finally do, our garden is off and growing. Hypnotherapy allows us to uncover the reasons for the weeds and make us aware of them, so that we can recognize how to tend to them when we start to see them appear on our path. Little by little they creep up and we don’t even notice them, until one day we are like WHOA? Where did these come from? Hypnotherapy gives us the opportunity to plant new seeds of what we want to see grow. We don’t know how many sessions it will take, but eventually as long as you are willing to tend to your garden mindset, wonderful things will bloom. At first, our fixed mindset wants us to believe that these things cannot be changed and that is how life/things will always be… I am here to tell you, grab your tools and tend to the garden in your mind.
Now that I have given you some mental gardening advice, here are some ways that you can make the most out of learning how to create your mindset garden. First, you should start by taking notice of the weeds (A.K.A. not so attractive thoughts) that keep growing in your space. Really look at them and ask yourself what they represent? It may take a few tries but keep at it. Once you are able to identify those weeds, you need to decide how you are going to replace them with something that you want to see growing. In hypnotherapy we call this reframing. Sometimes you can pull weeds, but the roots are deep and it takes a few rounds to really make sure that they are gone. Our thoughts are no different and if we are not careful, people will drop seeds back into our mind that will cause those weeds to grow back. Now that you have weeded your thoughts, you can decide what you would like to plant. This is the exciting part! You are the one who is growing this garden of dreams, so it’s all up to you. A few things to keep in mind… How much time does your seed need to germinate before you start to see the growth? Does it need a specific soil or plant food? Can it only be grown in certain types of climate? If your seed dream is to teach people to surf and you live in Alaska, you might frequently say to yourself, I could never do this, it’s too cold here and there are no waves, that’s going to be a tough seed to grow. The mindset around that will take some big adjustments. Maybe it means you have to move to a place where there is water that you can actually surf in? Possibly create retreats 3 times a year? Are you seeing the mindset change? It all depends on how much you want the thing you are planting to occur. Of course, this is just one example of how we can look at mindset. It may have nothing to do with a career but at the end of the day, it is our thoughts that determine how we grow. Hypnotherapy helps to uncover blocks that you have created over the years that keep you on the (going nowhere) treadmill of life. The reason that I am so passionate about this is because I am guilty of being on that same treadmill of recurring thoughts. It has taken a lot of inner work these past couple of years and it amazes me all that I have learned. I too have had my share of weeds, but once I began to really look at what I wanted to cultivate and grow, I did my research, learned some life lessons, and now I am watching my garden of dreams grow. This is why mindset is so important. It is never too late! It takes courage and a willingness to be uncomfortable in spaces to see our life grow. A seed spends the first few weeks/months in the complete dark. Here is my top 5 list of ways to begin cultivating your positive mindset.
- Pick the top 3 things that you would like to see growing in your life: Really. Sit down with some paper and pencil and do a brain dump of what is working and what isn’t working in your life and see what you get. Then think about approximately how long you have been thinking this or doing things this way. Now write how you would like to see improvement of these things growing in your life. Write a brief paragraph about how you are going to achieve them. Really visualize yourself in that space as if you are already there living out that goal.
- Make a list of the habits that you do daily: By doing this activity, you are going to see where you focus your efforts and time each day. This should also be done with what you eat. Why do habits matter? You are doing this to see if they are in line with the mindset that you are trying to create or move towards. For example, if you are trying to incorporate exercise into your day to be healthy and you aren’t exercising at least 3 times a week that would need to change. If your daily habits are not in alignment with what you are growing, then it is going to be a difficult time being in alignment with them.
- Don’t worry about what you cannot control: This is a BIG one. We spend a lot of time worrying about the “what if’s” and not enough time tending to the things that we have control over. We cannot control what others think, feel, or do but to a large extent, the “what if’s” take up a lot of mental space in our brain. Well, what if no one likes what I sell? What if people think I’m too (insert your choice of commentary)? It doesn’t really matter. There are billions of people on this planet, we aren’t going to make all of them happy. Plant your seeds, water your garden, and pay attention to what you are growing. You can still admire what your neighbor is growing but your garden should be the focus. Control your own thoughts and keep them in alignment with the mindset you are committed to growing daily.
- Movement: Get out and move daily. Go for a walk, get fresh air, move your body. There are lots of ways you can exercise and it is not rigorous. Feel the sun on your face or the raindrops on your skin. Be in mother-nature. Connect with the earth, put your bare feet on the grass or the concrete. Put your technology down and take a break. Give yourself permission to be “one” with the footprint you are taking up on Earth. Appreciate the breeze or humidity (I am in Florida and am used to this), look at the clouds moving, taking your mind off the current situation that has you stressed, confused, or feeling out of sorts. Remind yourself of the journey you are on, reframe your thoughts and get back into the positive mindset you are growing.
- Gratitude: Take a few moments daily and find 3 things that you can be grateful for. Life can be stressful, but finding grace in those moments of uncertainty reminds us that there is something bigger than ourselves to think about. Look at what you do have and work with those thoughts. Remind yourself of the dreams you have, put your hand on your heart, feel your heartbeat and thank yourself for getting you this far in life. You are strong and smart, remind yourself of the mind space you need to be in to see and feel success.
Whew, that was a lot to think about. After you have gone through those 5 sample items, you will have a pretty good idea of where your mindset is at. Hopefully you will recognize if there are things that need to be changed. Write down the things that need to be weeded out. Really pull out what you can until you think you have gotten to the root of the thought. Then you can figure out what seeds need to be planted in place of what is no longer serving you. If you are unsure of how to do these things or you are having difficulty coming up with what your weeds are, maybe a hypnotherapy session or two would help sort out your garden. Our mindset is only as productive as we direct it to be. It will not be a one and done kind of activity. You need to keep looking at your thoughts, monitor how you are feeling, and then look at what your actions are producing. If it’s in alignment with the goals that you have created for yourself, then there is a good possibility that your mindset is growing the way you need it to in order to promote success. Celebrate your blooming mindset garden, make sure it is watered regularly, and monitor its growth process. Not all gardens grow alike. Yours will be unique to you and your dreams. Remember, we have the power to believe that anything is POSSIBLE!!! I will close with these final words. Sunflowers naturally know that they need the sun, so when Earth wakes them up each morning, they gravitate towards the sun to absorb the vitamin D needed for the flowers to flourish. Be your own version of a sunflower. Make your goals the sun and remember to face them daily, bask in their warmth and let them cultivate your actions so that you shine like you were naturally created to do. Mindset takes a little bit of gardening skills and a hero’s mentality to journey through the self.
Are you ready?